We came to Vegas for some American cultural immersion. This morning we purchased the new "Buffet Pass." In 24 hours, we can gorge at 7 hotel buffets for just $39.95. Gluttony is the 5th deadliest sin and we all know Vegas is called "Sin City." These iconic buffets have come a long way from the $2.99 pigs in a blanket breakfasts. There's competition now to present culinary extravaganzas.
8am, we begin at Paris, famous for it's chocolate croissants. I peruse avenues of food. Think protein Suzy, not carbs. There are pates to prime rib, assorted French cheeses, eggs a hundred different ways and enough sausages to line the Champs Ellysee. But I can't resist the sticky buns, strawberry waffles and almond crepes drizzled with caramel. As I end my breakfast of champions with a cinnamon muffin, I notice I've developed a muffin-top of my own, spilling over my Nike spandex pants. We waddle out the exit saying we must pace ourselves and we walk. We walk miles as far as our legs will carry us from one end of the strip to the other. Terry plays poker as I shop 170 stores in Miracle Mile.
2pm, Caesar's Palace Lago Buffet. I'm not even hungry but it's virtually empty with no line. For lunch I declare "salads only." With great restraint, I pass the Asia station. Pasta bar, carved turkey, roast chicken and braised beef. With pride, I pick at my plate of artichoke hearts until I notice the dessert station. Uh oh, there's cannoli, carrot cake, creme puffs. Berry tarts, meringues, cheesecakes, mousse and more! I had just a sliver of each, but like a proper Roman, I felt the urge to purge when I noticed I consumed more than Terry. Guilt, shame and remorse set in. I vow to fast tomorrow.
9pm, Spice Market Buffet, Planet Hollywood - spectacular and best spread of all. With military style self discipline, I set boundaries here vowing only to eat seafood and limit my portion size to 2 fist fulls. Then I spot pink cotton candy lining the dessert station. All bets are off when it comes to spun sugar. It was downhill as I sampled Mexican, Middle Eastern, Japanese, Greek and Italian delicacies. An hour later after 4 deserts and a stick of cotton candy, I can no longer chew. A Tic Tac would make me burst. That night Terry and I rolled into bed like "Mike & Molly". My joints ached. Terry says it's a glucose build up. My distended abdomen looks 7 months pregnant. My poor body doesn't know what hit it.
7:45am Wednesday - We return to yet another buffet to "get our money's worth" within these masochistic 24 hours. I had no appetite until the head baker puts out a mountain of warm Krispy Kreme doughnuts. I succumbed to death by carbs. It's game over.
This was one of those "must try it once in a lifetime experiences." Never again. 10am - we hit the gym. Gotta work off my bingo wings. After this day, Thanksgiving will seem but a snack. Via Las Vegas.
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